http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/EqE-qZwl2fo/nanoscale-snowman.html

Simon sez, "David Cox at the UK National Physical Laboratory has created this snowman, which is ~20µm high."

The snowman was made from two tin beads used to calibrate electron microscope astigmatism. The eyes and smile were milled using a focused ion beam, and the nose, which is under 1 µm wide (or 0.001 mm), is ion beam deposited platinum.

A nanomanipulation system was used to assemble the parts 'by hand' and platinum deposition was used to weld all elements together. The snowman is mounted on a silicon cantilever from an atomic force microscope whose sharp tip 'feels' surfaces creating topographic surveys at almost atomic scales.

Christmas 2009 : Educate + Explore : National Physical Laboratory (Thanks, Simon!)

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/c02Hf8qy8c0/organizations-sign-o.html

French activist Jérémie Zimmerman sez,

A worldwide coalition of Non-Governmental Organizations, consumers unions and online service providers associations publish an open letter to the European institutions regarding the Anti-Counterfeiting Trade Agreement (ACTA) currently under negotiation. They call on the European Parliament and the EU negotiators to oppose any provision into the multilateral agreement that would undermine the fundamental rights and freedoms of citizens in Europe and across the world.

By December 17th, 2009, European negotiators will submit their position regarding the proposal put forward by the U.S Trade Representative for the Internet chapter of the ACTA. It is now time for the European Union to firmly oppose the dangerous measures secretly being negotiated. They cover not only "three strikes" schemes, but also include Internet service providers liability that would result in Internet filtering, and dispositions undermining interoperability and usability of digitial music and films.

The first signatories of the open letter include: Consumers International (world federation of 220 consumer groups in 115 countries), EDRi (27 European civil rights and privacy NGOs), the Free Software Foundation v(FSF), the Electronic Frontier Foundation (EFF), ASIC (French trade association for web2.0 companies), and civil liberties organizations from all around Europe (9 Member States so far...). The letter is open for signature by other organizations.

ACTA: A Global Threat to Freedoms (Open Letter) (Thanks, Jérémie!)

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/XBQ8s6Oe2ck/steampunk-pewter-coa.html

eBay seller Treasure Cast makes pewter coat-buttons cast from the guts of old mechanical watches, a lovely idea.

SteamPunk Buttons - FIVE Steampunk Watch Buttons 1066 (Thanks, Liz!)

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/7rY7Mc-_5Bg/goldman-sachs-banker.html

A couple weeks ago, I blogged a Bloomberg column by Alice Schroeder that alleged that Goldman Sachs bankers were buying handguns to protect themselves from peasant uprisings. The Wall Street Journal has investigated the claim, and they think it's bogus:

New York police spokesman Paul J. Browne says that their records show only four Goldman employees have applied for gun permits in recent years -- and the last application was made in 2003. That application, by the firm's head of security for a "carry permit", was granted. The only other employee granted a NYPD carry permit" is a building security guard. It was issued prior to 2003, said a police spokesman. Those applying for a permit must list their employer.

Two Goldman employees have residential permits, allowing them to have guns in their homes. The last of these permits was issued in 2001, Browne said. One of the permits was issued to a trader and the other was given to a graphic designer.

"We haven't seen a surge of applications of any kind for Goldman Sachs employees," said Browne.

Are Goldman Sachs Bankers Really Carrying Guns? (Thanks, Waldo!)

http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20091211

The Girl Genius comic for Friday, December 11, 2009 has been posted.

http://www.chrononaut.org/log/?p=2247

It’s mean to give people who don’t know any better a platform from which to make fools of themselves in public.

Love,

The Internet

http://xkcd.com/674/

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/sluggy_freelance/~3/r72LfBV6ue8/COMIC091211

Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad could be here, right now.

http://www.goblinmercantileexchange.com/2009/12/signing-at-uncle-hugos/

http://www.goblinmercantileexchange.com/?p=1171

Hi folks, for those in town, I’ll be signing (and chatting and the like) at Uncle Hugo’s in Minneapolis, this Saturday from 1-2 p.m. The last week, I know, has been full of these little semaphores as there’s been much busyness and much afoot, but I hope to get back in the blogging swing of things very soon!

http://www.streetsblog.org/2009/12/10/orlando-kids-take-back-the-streets-by-bike/

(via dryadjuna)

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/typepad/lAQV/~3/EMszstvGygU/hot-new-fiction.html

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/tpVQW_h-5WQ/blackwater-and-the-c.html

An epic bromance. "It became a very brotherly relationship. There was a feeling that Blackwater eventually became an extension of the agency." —Former top CIA officer, on revelations that the private security firm now known as "Xe" had deeper ties to America's spy agency than previously known. Services included clandestine raids and secret transport of detainees.

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/ttPTUrrrUeI/walt-disneys-son-bus.html

More spawn behaving badly! Walt Disney's grandson busted for gun possession. You can't own guns in California if you are a felon, and reports say he is a felon (though no reports have specified what flavor).

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/El36NtGoECA/frazettas-son-busted.html

Police report that Alfonso Frank Frazetta (above) was caught red handed stealing 90 of his famous father's paintings. They said he and an accomplice had broken into the Frank Frazetta museum in rural Pennsylvania and were loading the paintings, worth $20 million, into a trailer.

Alfonso, 52, told the police his father had instructed him to "enter the museum by any means necessary to move all the paintings to a storage facility." But Frazetta, who is 81 and was in Florida at the time of the alleged theft said he did not give his son permission to remove the paintings from the museum. (Thanks, Antinous!)

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/IHasAHotdog/~3/S0hWu1jSvAE/

http://ihasahotdog.com/?p=49594

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ICanHasCheezburger/~3/cGe5uqnvFNE/

http://icanhascheezburger.com/?p=217554

http://www.the-isb.com/?p=2844

 

 

Today at ComicsAlliance, Dr. Doom sends holiday wishes to his subjects:

 

With Doomsgiving behind us, It is once again the Holiday season! The tree has been decorated with the treasures of the pirate Blackbeard, the goblets are full of delicous Doomnog, and as we approach this year’s mandatory two-hour Christmas celebration (increased from last year’s 90 minutes, for is not Doom a generous ruler?), Doom would like to take a look back and share some of this year’s treasured memories with you, his adoring countrymen.

 

Fashion, robots, and stand-up comedy. Truly, there is something for everyone.

Ever think, "That Jodi talks about sad ferret faces sometimes, but I don't believe they exist."

I give you Bobby's Sad Ferret Face Of Doom.



If you didn't just fall over weeping, you have a heart of stone.

And just so Todd fans don't feel left out:



He doesn't really do the sad face thing so much. He's Todd. He has his own cult.

Tags: crazy ferret lady, ferret pictures
Current Music: Escape! (from The Hours Solo Piano) - Philip Glass

I just added two necklace-crowns to the New Shinies post, but more importantly, I just added a lot of brass charm sets for anybody wanting to make stitch markers, and a few scrapbooking sets, and so forth. (They're at a special price, because they can only be bought with another item, or in one fell swoop of the entire category if you are really fierce about brass stampings.)

Edited to add: and they didn't last long, those charms and other brass goodies. Somebody did come and buy them all in one fell swoop! (I've got more coming, though, and I have Interesting Plans, which are hinted at in the labels on the tiny bags in the "mine mine mine" photograph under the list of charms.)

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/5NV-nCvej1I/alphabet-updated-wit.html

I had no idea that typography industry lobbyists were so powerful!

Tonight, I led a 5, improved the 6A on the roof on lead - I'm over the roof, I just need to be willing to fall in order to reach the next hold - led part of a 4, toproped a 6B and backtoback a 5 and a 3.

Not exactly the world's most productive climbing night, but after a day of writing presentation, and an evening of a seminar on ceramics and the archaeology of food in the Byzantine Mediterranean, I think I did well just to get to the wall.

One day I will write again. Something that is not thesis.

Tags: climbing, exercise, falling off walls
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: Leonard Cohen - Waiting for the Miracle

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ICanHasCheezburger/~3/mhIjJ-P5txs/

http://icanhascheezburger.com/?p=216918

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/FlTZv8JIdPY/very-young-kid-is-a.html

He barely knows how to talk yet, but he's already a better ukulele player than I'll ever be. (Thanks, Gabe!)

• 18:15 @smoemeth Genghises are the Best. Is that the squoodgy cuddlebunny? #
• 18:25 @smoemeth Ricardo? #
• 19:00 @smoemeth @wojsvenwoj Aww cute kitties. I gather spotty guy is Pumpkin? I can see it now. "Pumpkin? That's the orange one?" "No, he's grey." #
• 19:59 @smoemeth When you have littermates, they tend to keep each other calm. Is why multiples are worth the ahem Adventure. 8) #
• 11:13 @smoemeth They do eventually. For about six seconds. Mornings are prime time for Kitten Races. Have they gone up the walls yet? #
• 11:15 @smoemeth You could set up a trellis and give him a climbing wall. srsly. Minnow climbs mine all the time. #
• 11:40 @smoemeth Clearly your kitten is ready for this: www.cattv.com/catwebsite.htm #
• 11:55 RT @Johngcole: E&P closing, Palin Op-eds, Politico on Pulitzer board & Al Gore being asked questions from Palin's facebook. Media in 2009 #
• 11:59 Thx! RT @ce_murphy @dancinghorse, aka author Judith Tarr, offers 4-hour writer mentoring packages as Xmas gifts: bit.ly/8Nacx5 #

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http://feeds.roflrazzi.com/~r/ROFLrazzi/~3/YCK-5vj_oF8/

http://roflrazzi.com/?p=35551

http://www.journalscape.com/tim/2009-12-10-15:04/

Our poor sick kid. I'm told he spent most of yesterday just sitting around, vaguely moaning, and occasionally breaking out in hives. When I got home from work I found a very sleepy little kid who was happy to sit next to me on the couch, sip water, and eat crackers. Given that he's normally a tiny dynamo of constant climbing tumbling energy, the mellowness was distressing. I gave him his bath and put him to bed and read him a story until he said "Done. Nap. Bye." And so I was dismissed. He slept through the night and seemed better this morning, with more energy, though still had a few hives, and maybe a bit of a fever. Poor little dude.

After he went to bed last night my wife made an awesome dinner -- arugula, sauteed mushrooms, and a white wine/brie sauce served over penne pasta. So very yum. We watched Gran Torino, which I liked a lot -- some high melodrama, a smart resolution, and it was funnier than I expected, though some of the acting seemed less-than-stellar. But Eastwood was great fun, embracing his inner old tough-as-nails curmudgeon. "Ever notice how you come across somebody once in a while you shouldn't have fucked with? That's me." Awesome.

Around 10:20 I realized I hadn't written anything in a few days, so I dragged myself to my computer with the plan to make myself write for an hour, or at least stare at the empty screen. Once I got going, I zipped along at a nice clip, and did about 2500 words in a bit under an hour -- faster than my usual cruising speed, even. Getting started was the only hard part; overcoming that couchbound inertia. I'm about 2/5 of the way through my work-for-hire novel. Should hit the halfway point or even more by Christmas. Fun fun.

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Videogum/~3/QEHIzr5fEnQ/you_can_make_it_up_hanukkah_on_105271.html

All of the guidos and guidettes gathered around the menorah. Well, no. All of the guidos and guidettes were upstairs in the bathroom, blowing out their hair, or tanning in the tanning beds that they owned. They weren't just going to fuckin', like, gather around some fuckin' candleabraah until they looked good, son! Jwoww picked out the perfect Hanukkah g-string to wear under her Hanukkah cut-offs. "Let's go, you sluts!" she yelled at the other guidettes. "Fuck you, you whore!" Angelina yelled back. Snacko didn't yell anything, she was puking her guts out.

"Where's Ronnie?" The Situation asked.

"He's doin' sick Reps, bro," Pauly said. "He drank like 10 Diet Red Bulls."

"Well is there any Diet Red Bulls left?" The Situation asked.

"Why don't we get off of Diet Red Bulls because I just did your mom from behind."

They high-fived. Ronnie came in, shirtless. Because Ronnie doesn't own any shirts. He gave everyone a high five.

Continue reading You Can Make It Up: Hanukkah On The Jersey Shore...

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Videogum/~3/mz3UshYp-mU/you_guys_we_should_buy_more_di_105261.html

Speaking of car parts: I never would have thought that I'ld be interested in watching an advertisement for Die Hard batteries, but this one stars Reggie Watts just being Reggie Watts. Now I am all like, Die Hard batteries are the coolest!

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Videogum/~3/BF-tcVuS0B8/snoop_dogg_up_in_this_gps_105251.html

Despite the fact that this is almost painfully predictable and could just as easily be a gag on an episode of Family Guy instead of a thing that you can actually (ironically?) buy for your PT Cruiser, it is still the funniest thing I have seen all week.

This GPS is REAALLLLLL! Snoop explains his process, and his motivation as a GPS actor:

"Its really because when I be riding the car and I be hearing the boring ass lady that be doing all the time it bothering me. She's always turning my music down and being like, 'turn left, go right, straight ahead.'"

Sure. Got it. Got it, Snoop! (Via JustJared.)

UPDATE: I have been informed that this is a couple weeks old, so please do not bother writing to tell me that it is old as I have already been told that. In any case, it is new to me. Maybe YOU should start a blog, doctor!

I am home from work, tired, angry, and in need of fifteen professional hockey players with respectable and yet unprickly hockey stubble to cuddle me and make it go away. Barring that, I'm ordering takeout, but it means I have sadly got nothing here and all you get is a meme.

So.

If I came with a warning label, what would it say?

Tags: dayjobbery, the sheep look up
Current Mood: exanimate
Current Music: none

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/j4ccVz6pcn8/medical-marijuana-re.html

A medical marijuana dispensary in Denver is taking a fun new approach to distributing pot — it's marketing itself as a restaurant. Called Ganja Gourmet, it has a full menu of international dishes — lasagna, pizza, paella, jambalaya — made with medical marijuana. The waiters are all dressed in tie-dye and they offer free rides home to people who are too high to drive after their meals.

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/IHasAHotdog/~3/Dh4yWtdf0LY/

http://ihasahotdog.com/?p=49576

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/celebuzz/RfKn/~3/AGdSL0uGW7E/esther_fugadas.html

I'm sorry, I know this is supposed to be all alluring and nightie-esque, but I'm annoyed just THINKING about wearing it:



That train is a killer. Not in the sense that it's super hot, but in the sense that it will end up murdering someone when they trip on it and, say, fall down a flight of stairs or out a plate-glass window and into a pool, or into their jet's emergency exit door, tripping the lock and then getting sucked into the atmosphere. It's literally a killer. I mean, I don't think this train is a sociopath, or anything. It's not sentient. It's not PLOTTING these things. They just HAPPEN and it's that train's fault. Technically, I guess Esther Canadas's train is a manslaughterer. But that's still not appropriate for parties.

Dear SFWA members,

SFWA President Russell Davis has posted the most recent iteration of the new draft bylaws for SFWA, the review of the membership. Please log in to to the Discussion Forums to give us your feedback.

If you would like to read the draft of the new bylaws, they are available here in .pdf format and may be shared with non-members.

At the same time the membership is reviewing this, we will be asking our legal counsel in both Colorado and an associated office in California, to review the document as well.

Members have until February 1, 2010, to review these bylaws, ask questions, make comments, bring up concerns, etc. On that date, the Board will resume discussions based on the feedback from members and counsel, and will move to draft a final set of bylaws which is the one that the members will be asked to vote on.

Please give us your comments at the Discussion Forums

Mirrored from SFWA | Comment at SFWA

Tags: news, sfwa blog, sfwa business

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/W0ONJ6oEGyI/rick-warren-does-the.html

Rick Warren has officially come out against the proposed laws in Uganda that would make homosexuality a crime, punishable by death in some cases. In an open letter to the pastors of Uganda (with whom Warren has a great deal of influence from his missionary work) the American mega-pastor says,

As an American pastor, it is not my role to interfere with the politics of other nations, but it IS my role to speak out on moral issues ... the potential law is unjust, extreme and un-Christian toward homosexuals, requiring the death penalty in some cases. If I am reading the proposed bill correctly, this law would also imprison anyone convicted of homosexual practice ... I urge you, the pastors of Uganda, to speak out against the proposed law.

Obviously, Warren holds (and reiterates in the letter) beliefs about sex and about queer men and women with which I thoroughly disagree. But I want to thank him for doing the right thing here, for putting his influence and power to use to save the lives of innocent people. Hopefully, Warren's letter will make a difference.

Rick Warren: Letter to the Pastors of Uganda

http://smallbeerpress.com/not-a-journal/2009/12/10/red-sox-radio-interfictions-2/

http://smallbeerpress.com/?p=6702

The Red Sox just visited Franciscan but I only saw them leave because I was doing something else—but they visited Ursula and Kelly. Pictures were taken, by them, not us! They’re so young! And, so big! Seemed very nice. Apparently signed baseballs and took pics and made some of the kids (and maybe one or two of the parents) v. happy.

We’re on the radio tomorrow morning, call in and you too can take part in one of the oldest traditions in radio: pay to play!

Thanks to everyone who bought books at the sale or full price! You are awesome. We’ll wait until the end of the year to add up the donation but it should be a couple of hundred dollars.

We’ve run out of Interfictions 2 at the office (awesome!) so those orders have to wait a few days until the 4 more cartons of it we ordered come in.

Magic for Beginners has been included in a Best of the Decade lists from Salon—yay!

Kirkus Reviews is closing. What?!

Publishing is all about the tees. (Not a sic.) Go, Eric!

Nice review of our favorite bibliomystery Hound at Gumshoe.

And that’s the week that was.

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ICanHasCheezburger/~3/EvKZKqLvYIs/

http://icanhascheezburger.com/?p=216890

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/celebuzz/RfKn/~3/Jo0LTWLhbEA/fug_or_fab_posh121009.html

http://www.the-isb.com/?p=2842

Eartha Kitt – Santa Baby

15 Days ‘Til Christmas!

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/Lb1gPT66u20/sustainability-on-ic.html

Want to make your diet more sustainable? Buy your fish frozen, not fresh. Researchers studied the ecological impact of salmon and found that, "the questions of organic versus conventional and wild versus farmed matter less than whether the fish is frozen or fresh. In many cases, fresh salmon has about twice the environmental impact as frozen salmon." (Via New York Times)

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/r7ttOnZkvV4/sneak-peek-at-audrey.html

Artist Audrey Kawasaki posted a bunch of photos of her in-progress paintings, which will be unveiled at her Hajimari solo show at Jonathan Levine Gallery in NY this coming Saturday.

Sneak peek at Audrey Kawasaki's upcoming Hajimari show

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Videogum/~3/XKqWaZNCEGI/the_sex_and_the_city_2_poster_105211.html

Look, I know that it's almost Y2K10, so it's a little late to start speaking truth to Big Sex and the City (or is the expression speaking truth to Mr. Big Sex and the Ci--[gunshot]). That ship has sailed. I'm pretty sure the last anti-Sex and the City rant that anyone cared about or that had anything new to say was posted on an angelfire site.

"Don't you guys think that Sex and the City is mildly offensive trash?"
--Jukt Micronics Mission Statement

Nevertheless. Ladies. C'mon sons.

For one thing, what is that tagline? That tagline clearly went to the Sherlock Holmes School of Taglines. Not only is it lazy and cheap, it doesn't even make any sense. Tim Gunn, I guess? Are all of the clothes in this episode* going to be made by emotionally unhinged would-be reality show stars of varying levels of technical proficiency but equal talents for making fools of themselves? Queer Eye for the Zing Guy!

But in addition to the tagline there is EVERYTHING ELSE.

Continue reading The Sex And The City 2 Poster Is A Piece Of Crap...

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Videogum/~3/JINhENLhWQ0/one_trailer_to_rule_them_all_105201.html

OK, yup, you right, this would be a very exciting movie.

So I got some interesting brass charms and stampings today. Buying in bulk means one of my favorite things: sorting. After sorting, I have some excellent items to use for necklace-crowns, chained flask pendants, decant holder pendants, earrings, and so forth, and I also have a lot of leftovers that I probably am never going to get around to using.

Ergo, there will be some bags of goodies at very cheap prices added to the Current Shinies list when it goes up tomorrow.

And two necklace-crowns, because I've been busy.

And maybe more. I must go contemplate some things.

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/celebuzz/RfKn/~3/UKBEpJRjpAU/fug_or_fab_fergie121009.html

[Photo: WENN.com]

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/kg-KBWfYooc/ukrainian-student-ki.html

A 25-year-old chemistry student died when he chewed chemically treated gum that exploded and blew off part of his face.

Are you ready for the TSA to ban chewing gum?

"A loud pop was heard from the student's room," the ukranews.com portal said, citing an aide to the city's police chief. "When his relatives entered the room they saw that the lower part of the young man's face had been blown off."

A forensic examination established that the chewing gum was covered with an unidentified chemical substance, thought to be some type of explosive material.

Police questioning revealed that the student had a bizarre habit of chewing gum after dunking it into citric acid. On his table, police found both citric acid packets and a similar-looking unidentified substance, believed to be some kind of explosive material.

Ukrainian student killed by exploding chewing gum (Via Arbroath)

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/boingboing/iBag/~3/2mGKv4D1820/eurovision-1971-woma.html

Improv Everywhere travels back in time to 1971, or mind-lock virus? (Via Arbroath)

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Videogum/~3/ko4vpEkNNMA/glee_s01e13_finale_kit_dorkz_105151.html

[Gabe Liedman is a stand-up comedian, and one half of the Gabe and Jenny comedy team with Jenny Slate. But at the top of that resume it states that he is Videogum's Official Expert on this season of Glee.]

So, the season finale of Glee, guys, right?! :( :( :(!!! Not because it was bad (WHICH IT WASN'T), just because it's over, for now, until April or some shit, so American Idol can have 3 consecutive nights of prime Fox-air in a row, every week, and shit can suck for a while. But, we're not talking about that right now. We're talking about Gleeeeeeeee, show of shows, finale of finales, Mercedes screaming Dreamgirls of Mercedes singing Dreamgirlses. All the little loose ends were tied up Gleely in tight little dork-bows, and they even set up some maybe-entertaining dork-plots for season 2. Kurt coulda used a line or two, and weirdly Puck kept his top on the whole time, and even though the soundtrack was a little Broadway-heavy for my Gaga-blood, I still managed to finish it, and even enjoy myself thoroughly.

Continue reading Glee S01E13: Finale?! K.I.T. Dorkz!...

http://www.npr.org/blogs/monkeysee/2009/12/whats_wrong_with_julie_powells.html?ft=1&f=93568166

by Linda Holmes

As you may recall, I offered what I called a "contrarian defense" of Julie & Julia -- one that I think applies equally to both the book and the movie. I thought it was a cool project, I thought she had something useful to say about teaching and learning and food, and I definitely thought -- and still think -- that because she got a book deal and a movie deal and made a lot of money, she was rung up for a lot of generic Blog Sins that have nothing to do with her and are not her fault. I wasn't bothered by her chatty style, I wasn't bothered by the fact that she swears (join the club), and I thoroughly enjoyed both the book and the movie, and found neither particularly presumptuous.

That said, I found her latest book, Cleaving, one of the most unpleasant reading experiences I've ever had. Not uncomfortable, not challenging, not in-your-face, not too real. Unpleasant to read, ultimately pretty boring except when it's irritating, and a book from which I took nothing away at all except perhaps a clarification of my own sense of what I do and don't want to read.

Three hundred pages I wish I hadn't read, after the jump.

Here's what the book is about: just as Powell was finishing writing Julie & Julia (the book), she entered into an affair with an old boyfriend which lasted for about two years. It didn't take her husband very long to figure it out, and after it became clear that (1) she wasn't willing to stop, and (2) she nevertheless wanted to remain married, and (3) he wasn't willing to leave her (for reasons that are extremely difficult to understand), he also wound up involved with someone else.

So in this book, everything goes bad, and she heads off to apprentice in a butcher shop. There's supposed to be something very earthy and meaningful about meat-cutting, and the bloody brutality of it all is supposed to stand in for various emotional upheavals.

But mostly, the book is about how incredibly awesome her affair was. If you flip through the book and find a passage where she is talking about being happy, excited, turned on, passionate, moved, soulful, or something of that nature, you can be just about certain it is about the lover, not the husband. She wants you to know, in particular, how great the sex was, in highly specific detail.

When you write a memoir, it seems to me you have to ask this question: Why would anyone care?

Unlike those who threw accusations of solipsism at Julie Powell years ago, I understood perfectly why she thought people would care about the Julia Child project. That was really interesting to me -- the cooking, the differences in techniques, the struggles to procure ingredients people don't use anymore, the tenacity it takes to do something that daunting, the way you battle frustration.

But honestly, for me to want to read a 300-page book about someone else's personal life, she'd better have an interesting perspective on it. And perspective is what Cleaving doesn't have, perhaps because it seems to have been written with great haste (the timeline dictates as much, really) as it was happening, without the benefit of the kind of distance that a story like this requires. It's just tell, tell, tell. Tell about how much you liked being slapped around, tell about the racy texting, tell about how you literally stalked the guy, following him around trying to give him a gift after he broke it off, and mailing said gift to him after he made it clear he didn't want it.

With all the explicit stuff in the book (her account of having anonymous sex with a stranger seems to be getting the most attention), let me tell you where she lost me for good. She tells a story about being out in public with the guy, called "D" through most of the book, with whom she's having the affair. By this time, she was somewhat famous, and a fan came up to her on the street and gushed about loving her work. The fan looked at D, assuming he was the beloved husband she had written about extensively. And D smoothly took the fan's hand and said yes, he was her husband Eric. Here's how Powell tells it:

I almost laugh in dizzy relief, right in the woman's face. I must look completely dazed, with hectic eyes and a plastered-on smile. D's no wild-eyed rebel, doesn't race hot rods or start fistfights in bars or snort lines off strippers' asses ... (much ... that I know of). But he has a way of, with just a sly smile, a tiny lie, making me feel gleefully wild. I am trembling; I can't wait to get him home.

I can't really explain why, but her glee at watching D make a fool out of an adoring fan while also making a fool out of Eric was the moment I knew she wasn't getting me back. There's no perspective in the way the story is told, no sense that in retrospect, she understands that this was enormously disrespectful both to the woman she deceived and to the husband she's still married to now. Maybe she feels that, but it doesn't come through in the book. What comes through in the book is that this was pretty great, and really funny, and that this is the kind of wild, adventurous behavior -- lying, apparently -- that made D so irresistible. My sense was that, as in the rest of the book, she kind of knows she should feel bad, but she doesn't.

Can I speak to how she feels? Of course not. But I can tell you what the narrator of the book projects, and the answer is: not actual guilt so much as awareness and resentment of the fact that she's expected to feel guilt.

Don't get me wrong; it's not that you can't do regrettable or dishonest things and write about them in a good memoir. But for me to enjoy it, that takes reflection. It requires that you not appear to be bragging about the worst things you did and how exciting they were, while insisting that really, you feel terrible. In fact, you could write a memoir in which you explain why you do not feel bad about your affair, and if that seemed to be your authentic perspective, maybe that would be interesting. But when your internal struggles seem to be the ones you think you're supposed to be having more than ones you are actually having, then the book feels inauthentic and dull.

Here, the conflicts she says she has, or had, aren't consistent with anything she did, or is doing. She claims to feel terrible and embarrassed and to regret enormously everything she did that hurt her husband. The problem is that those claims ring false in light of the fact that ... you know, she wrote the book. It all becomes terribly meta, but when you read her statements about how her husband feels about having her write at length about her affair, she says things like this, in Slate:

Eric is naturally treading very carefully in the world right about now. We talked a lot about me writing this book, and I would never have published it without his blessing; couldn't have, legally, even if I were so callous as to choose to. Eric is a naturally reserved person in the best of times. He's also an extremely courageous and generous man. He's not exactly tripping through the daisies this week, but he is understanding enough to know what this book means to me, and what about it is important.

As she's describing it, that's not his blessing. That's grudging, pained agreement, which, frankly, she describes her husband doing quite a bit in the book as well. If you know your husband is a naturally reserved person, why would you even ask him whether it's okay for you to write in detail about your sex life without him? You already know it isn't; you're only asking if he will stand in your way. If you know he's a private person, why would you put him in the position of saying no to having his family and his friends read about how hot it was when the other guy bit you? You want, in a situation like this, to review the book and not talk about the person, but here, if Julie Powell the author contradicts Julie Powell the narrator, what's a person to do?

I have no idea, after reading Cleaving, what Powell thinks "is important about it," as she put it to Slate. She also told Slate on Monday that if you don't like this book, it says more about you than it does about the book. So be it, I suppose.

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I forgot to mention on Tuesday, but even though It's Complicated doesn't look like the sort of movie I would go see, the trailer was full of not-young, not-skinny Meryl Streep being sexually active and sexually attractive. More attractive, in fact, than the toned "younger woman". After so many years of Hollywood fuckwittery and cougar jokes, that trailer made me intensely happy. Maybe I will go see it anyway, and hope for the best.

Tags: bitching, movies
Current Mood: not quite the thing